First published on Ayi Post.

 

At the heart of every great relationship is effective communication.

 

It’s easy for couples living together to oil the wheels of relationship with effective communication but harder for couples in a long distance relationship to do the same.

 

Nevertheless, a study has shown that long-distance lovers feel more trust and satisfaction in their unions as geographically close partners. Not only this, this study also revealed that long distance lovers revealed more personal details to their partner.

 

 

The revealing of personal details to your partner and holding back nothing is the solid foundation for erecting pillars of trust, piece of mind and loyalty to each other in a relationship.

 

These pillars are built through effective communication that binds two lovers, physically separated by thousands of miles, together.

 

But how can long-distance lovers develop and enjoy the kind of communication that keeps the bond strong across several miles?

 

1. Agree to a mutually comfortable time to talk.

 

Have a set time, which you and your partner accept, to have a heart to heart conversation

 

Make this conversation a fun filled routine, enjoyed and looked forward to by both of you.

 

If for any reason, you or your lover wouldn’t be available for the routine talk time, call ahead of time to share the reason.

 

2. Make it a time for story-telling and sharing the day’s activities.

 

  It’s important to keep the conversation interesting.  How could this be achieved? Relive your day and share it with your partner, tell it all; your success, failure and embarrassing moments. 

 

Don’t forget to share gossip and secrets. When you share gossip and secrets with your long-distance lover, it tells them you trust them deeply. It’s also grows and strengthens the bond between both of you across several miles.

 

3. Use modern technology to build the communication.

 

Use modern technology tools to make both audio and video calls and have quality time together

 

These tools make it possible to read the body language of your lover and interpret unspoken emotions correctly.  These unspoken emotions may be positive or negative. 

 

The accurate interpretation of your lover’s non verbal expression of a negative emotion for instance, places you in the best position to quickly show support before its’ late,  by offering words of encouragement and advice.

 

 You can also celebrate each other’s milestone and track each other’s activities across several miles with the use of modern technology tools. 

 

There are many ways you can use apps to keep your long-distance relationship going strong. So take advantage of them.

 

4. Discuss the future.

 

This is very important. Don’t ever forget to discuss the future with your long-distance lover every time both of you have a conversation.

 

It’s never boring to remind your lover of your long term commitment to the relationship and to reassure them that distance can’t erase what you feel for them.

 

By doing this regularly, you increase the chances of having your partner commit to the relationship for the long term too. 

 

One more thing, when this commitment comes from both of you, the temptation to have an affair with someone else in the same geographically location is almost non-existent.

 

  

5. No silent treatment.

 

The long distance that separates lovers does not eliminate little fights.

 

A fight is always going to happen but when it happens, don’t give your partner the silent treatment.

 

Take their calls and give them the chance to explain things in a manner that provides everyone an opportunity to express a genuine desire for reconciliation.

 

A silent treatment is a fertile ground to doubt each other’s commitment to the relationship.

 

Now, it’s worth knowing that keeping an effective communication going between long-distance lovers stops ‘out of sight’ from translating into ‘out of mind.’

 

Finally, it’s possible to be separated by miles but never by heart.